What “Twilight” taught me.

Yes, the Stephanie Meyer books. What could these, um, not-so-literary-genius books have taught you?, you seem to ask. And let me say, before we start, that if you are a die-hard sparkly vampire wish-head you will not like, and will completely disagree, with what I’m about to say so you should probably quit reading now to save yourself from hateful emotions (because those are bad!) or before commenting that these books are better than anything Poe wrote (because you are wrong!). So quit it!

I’m a reader. I’m on a constant lookout for new books to dive into. I love everything about books. I love the way they feel and the way they smell. There is nothing more exhilarating to me than opening a new book, and nothing more lonely than closing that last page of a great book.

I love books.

You read that right, books. All inclusive. Even the bad ones.

How can you appreciate a bad book, you ask? Like this, Stephanie Meyer taught me that life is too short to continue reading a lame book; there are far too many books on the shelf.

Once upon a time, I read all 3 (or is it 4?) Twilight books because I considered myself a “dedicated” reader. I finished every book that I started, even if I lost interest halfway through. I hoped that the hype I kept hearing about Twilight would pay off somewhere. Yea, it never did for me and instead it left me angry that I’d wasted any time on them at all. But, I justified, I wanted to give them a fair shake and form a proper opinion.

Now, listen to me, I totally get that what is a bad book for me is a good book for another. I get that the topic is subjective. So I’ll save defining my version of a bad book for another day. But basically, be original, be smart, and don’t try too hard. You can guess where Twilight missed the mark right? And don’t give me the excuse that these books were intended for young adults because J.K. Rowling wrote for CHILDREN, and what she produced were some of the most cleverly witty and creatively original books I’ve ever, EVER read. And not DUMBED-DOWN. Bah.

I’m getting to my point. Today marks a new day and therefore deserves a place in my archives for eternity! For the very first time in ever, I have closed a book halfway through a read. I have never, ever done that before today. So thank you Stephanie Meyer for helping me see the light. I refuse to spend another minute on a terrible book. And I don’t care to form a rounded opinion about the hypey ones anymore, a bad read is not worth it! I’m only sad that it took me so long to get a friggin’ clue.

At least it was 20% off.

So this. It wasn’t so much the not-so-subtle nods to characters of the bible and their strangely young and annoying libidos (which is clearly a ruse to get someone’s goat) but when Sylvia Day began name-dropping, I quit.

This is the first of a trilogy and I don’t even a little bit care about how this all plays out. And I really don’t mean this as an insult at all, but if you are a Twilight fan you will probably like this book. Plus, there’s premarital sex with Cain and a woman named Eve!!! Where are my Freudian followers at? So very oedipus, also incestuous (my auto-correct kept trying to change that to ancestral. :) That too, auto-correct. That too.) since she also has the hots for Abel. Yep. I’m giving away a copy for those of you interested. :) No judgement. There are also werewolves, see like Twilight! (And what they have to do with the bible I’m still not sure.)

But on to better books…

These I quite enjoyed, and one that is not in the photo because it was purchased in iBooks, is Dark Objects by the same author. All page-turners and quick reads and thriller mysteries. Mucho like for their originality. Well done, GF.

Good 'uns.

Now that I’m done, it’s your turn to tell me some not-so-stellar books YOU’VE read recently. And, in your opinion, what made them bad? Also, since I’m currently between books, I am looking for some recommendations… for good books. :D And if you say 50 Shades I will cut you. (Although I’ve heard that “Between Shades of Gray” by Ruta Septys is quite wonderful and, incidentally, has absolutely nothing to do with BDSM or the 50 Shades books. Have you read this and did you like it?)

Ok, now I’m really done. Books, books, books.

Cheers friends and happy Spring!

Comments

  1. says

    I read the first Game of Thrones book 6 years ago. FAIL
    I read the entire Sword of Truth series all 21 books even when I HATED the final 6 books because I loved the first book, one of the best stories ever.

    I love everything that I have ever read from Jim Butcher. I really like most stuff from Dennis McCernan (spelled wrong). Most of the books from the Riftwar series.

    I am not embarrassed to say the my favorite set of books though is about the Boy Who Lived

    I still haven’t learned the Twilight lesson. In fact I might have learned the wrong lesson. I don’t read as much as I once did because I don’t have time to waste on bad books, so I don’t read at all. :|

  2. says

    Hey, thanks! I’ll have to check those out! Frankly, I have to say, anyone who is not captivated by HP is just weird and fighting the system unnecessarily. :)

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